Who Am I?

I had a friend from school who I just reconnected with a few months ago post the following on her Face Book page “I am 39 years old and still finding out who the real me is…and learning what matters most in life….and here are all these kids thinking they know it all!!! I missed the know it all class I suppose cause I still don’t have all the answers!!!! “

I thought, you know I have been thinking and asking the same thing for the last four years.  I had even started a blog about it but then I just saved the working copy and never finished it.  Well I typed a reply to my friend’s post on Facebook and when I hit “post” it deleted all of my reply to her.  I immediately became very frustrated thinking, okay there was 20 minute wasted and now I have to remember everything I said so I can retype it.  I mean I thought it was too good not to retype word for word and share, so, I started to type it again.  All of a sudden other messages started coming in…every time I would think I was on a role with remembering what I said here came a message from someone.  All of a sudden in my head it was as if God was saying “HELLO, child…you in there????? I made you child, I know you are not that dense????? Goodness child, what it takes to get your attention!!!  Maybe your reply disappeared for a reason.”  Finally, I remembered my blog….  I’m so happy that He loves us NO MATTER what we do or how silly we are at times!!!

I remember telling my Pastor, if I had to remove all my labels of mom, wife, daughter and friend, I wouldn’t know who I was.  I mean over the years I had many labels to help explain who I was, shy, quiet, rejected, bitter, angry, determined, stubborn, independent, trustworthy manipulative, kind, compassionate, caring, dependable, and many others.  Well some of those I really like and some I don’t like at all, I actually despise.  Thinking about this even more the past several months during my cancer treatment recovery I was trying to figure out which ones fit me so I would know who I was, I started realizing I don’t have to have a specific definition beyond I’m a child of God’s.   I have decided I need to wake up each morning and before I raise my head to start the day I need to not only thank Him for the day, but I need to remind myself I am a Child of God’s and no matter what happens I am loved.     Beyond that the rest are just adjectives.  Although they are important I don’t have to define myself by just one or two of them.  I can be a mixture of any that a particular situation or God calls me to be.  I can continue trying to be as kind, caring and compassionate as I can, but it’s okay to get angry if someone hurts my family.  I can be strong, independent and determined to give my family the best of me and not let a certain situation define me, but only as long as it falls in line with God’s will and where He wants me.

As for having all the answers, I don’t have them, but the cool thing that I okay because nobody does.  We are not supposed to have them.  At the end of each day I need to not only thank God for all the answered prayers, but also for the unanswered ones, reminding myself sometimes it’s best to not have all the answers.  Any questions we don’t get answers too here, once we are in heaven we can always ask God.  As for the kids my friend talks about in her post, I think we should do what most parents have done in the past….sit back and wait for the time when they come to us and say “I was wrong and I need your help to fix this mess I have made. I guess I didn’t think about this part of it” Then, we smile inside, doing are best to not say “told you so” while we help them. J Afterwards, we can relax knowing once they have their first child, the cycle will start all over again and our children will then think we have all the answers….HA!

Have you figured out the answer to the question in the title?  I would love to hear any thoughts.

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6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Meg Groves Telligman
    Aug 23, 2010 @ 14:29:25

    I really like your definition “I am a child of God”. I like to add “I am a follower of Christ”. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

    Reply

  2. Bill (cycleguy)
    Aug 23, 2010 @ 16:11:04

    Let’s see…I am 57 years old and I have yet to totally figure out who I am. What does that say about me? DON’T ANSWER THAT! However, I will settle for child of the Father. I can handle that one.

    Reply

    • My Cup of Grace
      Aug 28, 2010 @ 00:12:57

      Thanks Bill for reading & commenting…..you and Jo have blessed me & my family in so many ways. You always encourage me to continue searching and to remember it is a journey!

      Reply

  3. Ike
    Sep 11, 2010 @ 20:05:54

    I am a humbled broken man who deserves nothing less than the eternal wrath of God. BUT……by His grace and mercy…..He saved me. He is precious! He is my treasure!

    Both Carol and I thank you from the bottom of our hearts for your prayers… and also for your gift. “We” know that you gave because you love Him! 1 John 3:17

    Carol has had her entire colon removed and she also had a double radical mastectomy. At present…..she is being treated for kidney failure. She is not living her “Best Life Now”……but praise the Lord…….He has provided a “glorious” future through His Son…. the Lord Jesus Christ! Isn’t He wonderful!

    “We” will never forget what you have done for us! And Pastor Bill will always have a special place in “our” hearts. What a wonderful day…..when we all will actually meet:-)

    Reply

    • My Cup of Grace
      Sep 13, 2010 @ 02:25:54

      Ike,

      I’m so sorry to hear of all you, Carol, Josh and Jen have gone through. The strength and faith that you and your family exhibit even in just what we see in the blog posts and comments are such an inspiration. I look forward to reading more from you and Josh and you are correct, it will be a magnificant day when we all can meet 🙂

      May God continue to bless each of you and provide you with the strength and peace that only He can. I pray you each will be able to feel His arms around you as He holds you close during these times.

      Reply

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