Bullying or Invisible, The Choice of a Child

When you are in school or even at home there are times you are happy when you are invisible. There are many programs about bullying now and I am glad some children are being kept from the cruelty, but are they really being saved? The problem is if you tell on the bullies, they usually make it worse for you, sometimes teachers just overlook it as normal child behavior and there are times the bullying is not just coming from school but from extended family and from home.

As I continue to work on my life memories and my book on Rejection I remember the many times I was one of the children being bullied but then I also remember how often I was grateful that I was invisible both at school and at home. I just prayed everyday that I could somehow blend in with the background all day so i was never noticed.

I was overweight from the time I was nine years, old so when we would play a game at school and I would fall there would be a comment like “Here comes an earthquake, Danay’e just fell.” or sometimes you heard the traditional chant of “fatty fatty 2×4” as I walked across the room. The sad thing is this didn’t just come from classmates or stop and school, it came from cousins with the same name calling and choosing games they knew I couldn’t play because of my weight. I even had an uncle that would call me Natalie, referring to Natalie off of “Facts of Life” because she was a little overweight. Adults would try to get my bullying to stop, at school they would tell the kids to stop but it didn’t; at home the cousins just laughed and continued making fun of me and my uncle would even be told by other family members to leave me alone and he would just bully me even more.

I am so grateful that many are trying to take on the subject of bullying but until we can figure out how to help kids from being bullied even more when they tell on their offenders, we get parents and other adults to stop children from bullying other children at home and we keep the adults from bullying the children, the children are going to continue being bullied and suffer the harmful consequences. With those options, the children will just hope and some pray they can just be invisible.

(Compel Enhancement tip: Hook in the first sentence)

Advertisements

15 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Susan B Mead
    May 14, 2015 @ 06:38:39

    TRUTH!

    Reply

  2. Nancy Silvers
    May 14, 2015 @ 08:18:25

    Thank you for sharing so transparently what many have suffered in silence. You are so right, bullying can stop only when we can get the adults to listen and to change THEIR behavior. Children learn so much more from what is done and not said. As long as adults not only turn a blind eye but also engage in bullying nothing will change. Thank you so much for being visible and sharing this painful experience in hopes of shedding light on this.

    Reply

    • My Cup of Grace
      May 15, 2015 @ 20:14:37

      Nancy,

      Thanking you for stopping by and leaving a comment. You are right, children do learn more from what they see. My parents had a plaque hanging in my room and my brother’s room and it was about raising a girl/boy but each line included how we learned that lesson by sight, not words. I learned so much from that growing up and I just wish some parents especially, would quit trying to be a friend to their child and would step in and be the authority figure and parent the child needs.

      Blessings,

      Danay’e

      Reply

  3. Kelly Balarie
    May 14, 2015 @ 08:45:02

    Bullying is tremendously heartbreaking. It is so hard for the child. I think what hurts me the most is seeing someone so vulnerable be hurt. That’s the pain. Great insights. Love the hook! Cheering you on from the Compel Linkup and Purposeful Faith!

    Reply

  4. Amber Paulsen
    May 14, 2015 @ 09:53:49

    I enjoyed reading your blog and I also was made fun of when I was little and those words hurt. Praying for you for healing and that you can know and believe with all of your heart how God sees you, “You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you.” (Song of Songs 4:7) I have had to say that verse thousands of times for my own healing. Praise God for the power of His Word! Cuts right through the enemies lies that begin in us at such young ages. God bless you and your family.

    Reply

    • My Cup of Grace
      May 15, 2015 @ 20:03:25

      Amber,

      Thank you for your prayers of healing and words of comfort. It is a shame the enemy starts speaking lies when we are so young. What a blessing we have our Savior to save us from all the enemy tries to do.

      Blessings,

      Danay’e

      Reply

  5. bcbo71
    May 14, 2015 @ 16:49:39

    Good thoughts. 🙂
    Bullying is so heartbreaking. It *is* nice that it’s gaining attention these days.
    Thanks for sharing. 🙂
    Blessings!
    ~Brenda Ottinger
    http://www.ChasingHoliness.com

    Reply

    • My Cup of Grace
      May 15, 2015 @ 19:51:10

      Brenda,

      It was great to read your comment. I agree, I think the more attention bullying gains the better it will be for those who suffer at the hands of it.

      Blessings,

      Danay’e

      Reply

  6. pkstew2
    May 14, 2015 @ 17:10:05

    Thanks for sharing on bullying today – I hope you will continue to share your words that you are writing on your Rejection book. Visiting from the Compel linkup.
    Kim Stewart
    http://www.kimstewartinspired.com

    Reply

  7. livingbraver
    May 16, 2015 @ 08:55:08

    Your blog is sweet and so real, thank you for being willing to share you with others – your words will touch many who need healing… (stopping by from Compel)

    Reply

  8. Montez Dove
    May 16, 2015 @ 19:48:35

    Danay’e,
    Thanks for sharing your real life story on bullying. I know from experience bullying can be very painful just as any type of rejection. Continue to share your story for God’s glory. And know that what the devil meant for evil, God has meant it for good.

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: